Experts say that shared challenges and exciting diversions are what make relationships hot long after the wedding gown has been packed up and stored away. And the opposite, boredom and a dull, daily routine, can kill a marriage, squashing intimacy and romance.
In fact, couples who say they are bored tend to grow increasingly unhappy, according to a recent study. Most research on long-term relationships has focused on eliminating problems such as conflict and tension, but surveys have suggested that boredom may be even more corrosive to a relationship.
Researchers found that boredom at the seven-year mark in a relationship strongly predicted future unhappiness and loss of intimacy nine years later. The researchers also found that bored spouses had higher tendency to divorce than couples who still found each other entertaining after seven years.
Bored and ready to bolt – people often show up in my office ready to bolt from a marriage because they’re bored. I tell them that changing partners isn’t going to fix the boredom. What will help is changing up the patterns. Make yourself more exciting instead of blaming your partner. Better yet, see if you can’t find something that you’re both passionate about that you can share.
Finally, take a look at my upcoming tele-class on:
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